Lesson 6- Thought-Based Coping

Welcome back! This is Week Six of the Coping Power program at your child’s school – they are officially halfway done with the program!

Last week, we talked all about unhelpful, automatic thought patterns. Your child learned about catastrophizing, missing the positive, all-or-nothing thinking, and jumping to conclusions. Quick review: remember that catastrophizing occurs when we turn a small problem into something huge. Missing the positive is when we focus on only the negative things that are happening and ignore all of the great things. All-or-nothing thinking occurs when we assume things must be completely correct or not done at all, and any mistake is failure. And, jumping to conclusions is when we try to predict the future or guess what others are thinking without actually knowing.

These types of thoughts can have a big impact on our emotions and the intensity of our emotions. Your child has been working to recognize the intensity of their emotions using the thermometer graphic.

Unhelpful thoughts can make us feel really angry, frustrated, sad, worried – even hopeless. If we’re able to change those thoughts into something more helpful, something that recognizes the positive, or makes room for our own growth and improvement, we can bring down the intensity of our emotions and feel more able to solve problems.

This week’s lesson on thought-based coping builds on that theme by introducing ways to engage in more positive, helpful self-talk. Students are practicing how to not only recognize and interrupt automatic thoughts, but then also how to replace unhelpful thoughts with more helpful or realistic statements about the situation.

Instead of thinking “I always, they never” or “everything is bad, everyone hates me,” students are exploring what happens to our feelings and behaviors when we move away from those extremes by considering, “I made a mistake, but I learned from it,” or, “I got in a fight with my friend, but we can work it out.” This should get them thinking about all of the amazing things they can do, all of the amazing ways they can learn, and all of the new skills they’ve acquired as they’ve made mistakes and grown.

In class, students are practicing how to interrupt automatic, unhelpful thoughts, change those into more helpful thoughts, and track how those changes in thinking impact their emotions.

We hope you’ll continue to encourage these conversations at home by asking your child about how their thinking might change when they feel their level on the “emotion thermometer” rising.

The next time you see your child become upset, work together to name and interrupt the automatic thoughts they might be having. Help your child to recognize any unhelpful thoughts and help them brainstorm more helpful thoughts that they can tell themselves instead. You might ask them, “how do you want to feel?” and “what thoughts support that way of thinking?”

Good luck with this power practice session, and we’ll see you next week!